You have to Know More in order to say “No More”

Know More

Know More

I liked this image and the play on words of the title “Know More” for me also carries the message of “No More”.
The image, again, began with one random line on the page. I then saw two closed eyes, but in the center, the energy of awakening the 3rd eye, the ajna chakra.

Within the past week, I have made the commitment to myself to stop telling lies to myself and others. I am not talking about little white lies, in which the sacred agreement is to avoid hurting another. I am talking about lies of substance that lead to veiled vision and denial.

The other evening my stepson was breaking down about school. And finally, I boldly told him, “I have always supported you in school, but I will not stand here and lie to you about your performances.” It was a transformative moment for him (and me). The party line before that was that we were to all lie to my stepson, including him to himself, so he would not feel “bad”.

And then on my birthday someone did something to me. I said to myself, “This is a fun game this person plays to love me and love me not in the same moment.”

That is a lie. It is not a “game”. It is not “fun”. It is not “love”. I am telling lies when I say otherwise in order to cover up my pain and my AWARENESS.

Finally, the other evening we were running very, very late for an obligation. I had to pick up my stepdaughter from the grocery store where she had met friends in the coffee shop. I pulled in to the parking lot. She was there with two friends right in front of me. I pulled into a spot and waited and waited, and finally had to get out of the car and yell, “Hey, get in the car”. She accused me of being mean, demanding, and that she was just telling her friends ‘Bye” and it only took 30 seconds.

That is all lie. It is not the time (30 seconds) which is the issue or what she was saying or not saying to her friends. Could be true or not.

The awakened truth is this- it was a “power play” on her part (typical of teenagers) in which she was showing me that she would come when she was ready- i.e. the energy was, “I have the power to make Kim wait”.

Normally, I would have lied to myself. Told myself I “overreacted” that she had “misunderstood” that she needed to get into the car and it “wasn’t that long” she was speaking to her friends. These would have all lies I told to myself for her. She did not even have to lie for herself.

Basically, my point is this-
When we see with our 3rd eye, we all know more than we realize. You know the truth. The question is are you willing to say “No more” to the lies?


The Truth is truly Free… While Lies will Cost you Dearly (aka How Liars Become such Angry, Exhausted, Bitter People)

For Her, The Truth is No Burden

For Her, The Truth is No Burden

For me, the Truth has mass and weight. There is solidity to the Truth, making it immovable and unalterable. The Truth is what it is. In my mind’s eye, I see the Truth as a solid, red square.

When you are in alignment with the Truth, the Truth is not a burden. Even it is solidity, the Truth is light in energy and principle. The Truth requires nothing from us. Thus, when we engage in the Truth, we are free.

Now, let us look at those who choose to live in lies. (Not the simple lies we tell in order to make ourselves and others feel better, but the devastating lies to mislead, control, and induce fear.)

When someone is choosing to lie, they are of course not in line with the Truth. In A Course in Miracles, it states, “Nothing real can be threatened.”

And here is what happens for those who lie. The Truth is real and can not be threatened. Lies are not real, and thus, are ALWAYS under threat.

We have lived and continue to live histories of lies on a personal and global level. There was a time when the lie that people of the Jewish faith were destroying the world was believed to the point of creating the sustaining the Holocaust. There was a time when the lie was told that people of a particular color were so worthless that their only worth could be extracted by having them serve others. Such lies- one after the other.

But, the Truth remained. Sometimes, much to our horror, clouded over and somewhat hidden by these crazy lies, but forever present, and forever waiting, with eternal patience, for our visions to clear the clouds, so finally we may see what was before our eyes all this time.

In my mind’s eyes, I see lies as black, dark vapor clouds. For liars, each and every day, and perhaps every moment, requires an input of energy into the creation and sustenance of these clouds.

Why? Because the clouds of lies are not real!! Without the liars input of energy, the liar knows that these clouded lies, being not real, will fall apart and fade away.

Thus, the liar is caught having to sustain something that is not real and the only way to sustain something not real is to put continual energy into it. Why? Because the lie, being not real, is incapable of sustaining itself.

The next time you are with someone who perpetually lies, notice how angry, bitter, and exhausted this person is. And think about this person and his or her day- how he or she must create and manage this dark, vapor cloud of lies for the lies to continue to exist. Imagine the care, the energetic cost and drain upon this individual as he or she tries to maintain these false entities.

And, this is what we do if we choose to lie to ourselves. When we lie, we must expend exorbitant amounts of energy maintaining something that was never meant to exist anyway. The lie is not real, and thus under constant threat and so extracts energy from us.

The Truth will set your free because it requires no energy from you. Lies will cost you greatly, because they require everything from us, simply to exist.

The One Truth Needed to Change Your Life



And there stood the Truth-
Alone and free-
Needing Nothing.

We all tell lies. In moments of desperation, we invest greatly in maintaining these lies.

We may lie to ourselves in any number of ways. We declare our family is “great”, when it is clearly dysfunctional. We tell ourselves our marriage is doing “fine”, when in fact the tension is unbearable. We convince ourselves that our children’s problems are “not that bad”. We tell ourselves that we are “not great”, when in fact we are amazing.

We cover. We hide. We divert. We project. And all the while, there stands the Truth, right before our eyes.

We believe in the relationship of the following: the more invested in the lie, the closer the lie becomes to being the Truth. We sincerely believe this idea – as if our invested energy can somehow turn lead to gold or lie to truth.

We forget that the Truth stands free-unaltered by any such machinations.

I picture the Truth as a large, red block- solid, uncompromising. We may try to hide it with clouded thinking, but there it stands- on its own, forever.

Sometimes I simply pray, “I do not know what to do next, but at this moment, I can at least acknowledge the Truth.”

The Truth (in my limited view and mind) may not be pretty, but covering it in lies does not change it.

The Truth needs nothing from us. It does not need exploitation, declarative sharing, modifications, prettifying, distortions, hiding, covering, or altering.

The Truth only requires one thing to change your World- and that is this- that you finally come to recognize it.

Look…Now…Before you is the Truth Written on the Wall

I see Me.  Thank God. Thank God.

I see Me. Thank God. Thank God.

Reset assured, dear one.
When all seems lost and you know not the next turn in your life,
a light shines within you even in the time most dark.

No man nor man-made situation may lay a single finger of darkness
upon this vibrancy.

It is only you, and your temporarily calloused eyes which
have become blinded to your own sacred brilliancy.

A single clouded moment does not cover up the sun’s brilliance
and a moment of blocked vision does not alter your own nature.

And when you forget this, when you believe, even for a minute,
in the darkness you sense around you-

Take heart and remember:

Your Spirit, your ever-present, God-given, brilliant Spirit
will upon occasion lift the veils that blind you and bind you.

All you have to do is sincerely ask.

Sometimes we get so used to telling ourselves lies that we forget the Truth is always present.

We may to lie to ourselves about any number of situations for any number of reasons. Often, these lies are not told to protect ourselves or get ourselves out of perceived trouble- oh, if only it were that easy.

The lies we tell often have to do with our own insecurity, fear, doubt, worry, anxiety, and sense of failure.

The other night I was handling something for my husband related to his children. I told him with a certain level of intensity to make sure he followed through. And he told me “You act like I am going to forget!”

And in that moment, my Spirit graced me with eyes that could see and before me on the wall (in my mind) appeared the words “You are acting like he will forget because in the past he has told you, repeatedly, that he forgets things.”

The truth has always been there. I have told myself the lie that I must compensate for my husband, make sure he doesn’t forget things, remember for him, etc.

When did this begin? Some time early in my life, I believed I was only of value if I helped people. I have spent a lifetime supporting this lie.

I am of value because I am who I am. And, I do not need to participate in the lies of others any more.

The truth of the matter was that my husband does forget things- often. I was trying to “help” him remember. In the past, I would have taken his statement to heart and chastised myself for being to “intense” and “not believing in him”.

The lie would have continued.

The truth is there for each of us in our lives- written on the walls, in books, in posts, in our hearts and in our minds.

Today, don’t lie to yourself to make something “better”. Let the truth stand. The truth is ever-present anyway. We simply cover it and hope it goes away. The truth, though, remains, awaiting our prayers.

Let yourself trust enough to handle the truth today-even in one situation, no matter how small you tell yourself it is. Believe and see with your vision.

A common Error…We know the Truth and then Spend Hours on the Lies

I See My Own Truth

I See My Own Truth

I don’t know your view of Heaven. I am not even sure I know my own. But, I frequently make the joke that in Heaven, if one’s life is laid before one’s self, I never want to see an accounting of all the money I have spent on Diet Coke.

A very small issue, I know, but I am sure I would be appalled at the income I have given to vending machines and convenience stores throughout my time to purchase this beverage with absolutely no nutritional value.

Along the same vein, but on a more serious note, is an epiphany I had recently- how much time I have spent on the lies of others.

The Truth simply is. We do not need to defend it, color it, attempt to hide it, reveal it, or modify it in any way. The Truth can stand on its own.

I know this, but I now also know how many literal hours I have spent on the lies of others.

My best example of this is my role as stepmother. For at least 2 years, lies were told about me. The lies included what a mean person I was, how the kids hated me, how the kids were fearful of me, how no one could ever like me, etc.

You know, I did not buy into these lies. But, I did make a fatal mistake. I tried to convince others who were telling these lies that their lies were not the truth.

I wasted hours on my scheme of conviction. I came up with examples, explanations, scenarios, dramatic re-enactments all to show them the truth – which was simply this- I am a loving stepmom. I make mistakes, of course, but making a mistake does not indicate a lack of love.

Whenever you are caught in a situation of lies, please don’t make the mistake I did. Stand your ground, for sure, but trust in the Truth. The Truth is there, whether others can see it or not.

If others are hell-bent on telling lies about you, because of their own weakness, delusions, or insanity, you do not have to spend hours trying to change their views (because most likely they will not change them anyway).

An important point to note, the person telling the lies is very, very invested in these lies. They will expend an inordinate amount of time defending, harassing, demanding of others all to get support for their lies.

Why? Do they think they are they right? May be, may be not.

The fact is they must spend so much time, energy and engagement on the lie, because the lie is NOT the Truth. A lie can never stand on its own. It must be fed, cared for, and paid the utmost attention, because it is not real. Without this time and energy invested, the lie falls apart, a deflated projection, prostrating its self before the Truth.

When we try to counteract these lies, we are actually playing into the hands of the liars. We are giving time and energy to things which are not even real.

I read many blogs about abusers, sociopaths, and narcissists. They are the ultimate liars and we have spent too much time on their acts of ridiculousness and their absurd lies.

Know yourself and Know your Truth. Trust that who and what you are can stand on its Own. You do not need to waste hours of time counteracting the insanity of others.

Your time and energy are needed elsewhere- loving your life and all the blessings you have been given. Let others live in the darkness of their lies, knowing your Truth and its light prevents such darkness from remaining in your Life.

When Your Art/Writing/Blogging Wants to go all “Humpty Dumpty” on You


Art is a great teller of secrets. It can’t help itself. It’s compulsive that way. Patient, but compulsive. It will wait- years if needed- before slipping in an idea or two- the secrets you would rather not tell.

I read a book by Anne Lamott and she spoke about a writing class she was teaching. She told her students to write whatever came to them- even if their family or others would not like it.

She wrote that she remembered at least two instances in which students wrote about being made to choose their own switches to be struck with by a parent as punishment. Hmm….not the image most families would prefer be portrayed- most would prefer the stylized, contrived family portrait hanging over the mantle to the true stories.

And most likely not the topic these authors upon signing up for the class imagined they would feel internally called to write about.

But that is the thing about creativity. Its nails scratch at the door, refusing to go away until you let it in.

Lately, I have been feeling this sense. When the opaque stone is removed from the eye, everything is seen more clearly. Art, creativity, and blogging tend to dislodge the stone- but then you are confronted with the sense – if I even move one stone slightly, what if they all come toppling down upon me?

We are afraid sometimes that in writing our truth, we are playing with Humpty Dumpty. Things will fall, parts will shatter, and no one or no thing is putting Humpty or our lives back together again in quite the same way.

I have admired those bloggers who can write with cutting honesty- the kind of honesty that dislodges the opaque stone and pushes the fragile Humpty’s in their lives over the edge.

I don’t know what I will do next creatively, but I do know this- when something presses upon you creatively, you can not suppress it completely. You can choose how you want to manage it – maybe a private journal vs. a blog or a small sketch vs. a large piece of work or you may want to put it all out there. Whatever the choice, art and creativity demand the truth.

And if we leave the truth behind and hide from it, I believe our art and creativity leave us behind. Art requires honesty and in exchange for our honesty, art gives us resonance and truth.

Is it True…or do you just NEED to Believe in It?


I would stake my life on you
If only my slippery mind could grasp and hold you.

When I watch my stepchildren, sometimes I am struck by the fantasy that this culture still wants to believe in – that divorce does not profoundly affect children, that children in divorce situations are “fine”, and that, as long as the divorce is “good”, the children are probably better off. None of this is true. Yet, we NEED to believe in these things. Otherwise, the pain of divorce is simply too great to bear. So we craft a narrative that children of divorce have no additional burdens than those children growing up in intact homes (Not that “intact” homes are always healthy environments- but that is another fantasy we NEED to believe.)

The legacy of divorce is significant for children. I am not saying it’s necessarily bad, but what is a problem is the fantasy that we create as a culture surrounding this issue and then insist the fantasy is real- not because of any facts, but simply because we so gosh-darn NEED it to be real. Because then our lives are easier.

We have other areas in our culture in which we craft and believe in a fantasy, again, not because there is any evidence, but rather we are not yet capable of confronting the alternative. I think a powerful example of this is our justice system. Many truly believe that the truth is always determined in court, that those in prison MUST have done something horrible, etc. Has the justice system gotten a lot of things correct- of course. Are some individuals in prison for a justified reason- of course. Yet, one can not look, even with a brief glance, a prison statistics and not think something may be awry when one considers the portion of prisoners who are young, Black males. But that is part of the fantasy, too, isn’t it? It must the young, Black male who is failing.

On a more global context, I have met people who believe in the fantasy that God loves us “more” because we are Americans. What? Why this fantasy? Because it plays into our self-image and we can not consider the alternative. If God loves us more as America, if we are “special” in His eyes, then whatever America does on the world stage is “fine” because God has chosen us. Obviously, this is not my view- but it has floored me to meet those that think this way.

We all have our fantasies. We need to make sure we do not confuse fantasy with truth. Just because you NEED to believe in something because it is easier to do so, or absolves you of guilt, or makes it so you don’t have to be responsible for anything, because everything is “fine” – does not mean everything you NEED to believe in is true.