Ring Around the Rosy – Children of Divorce

Ring Around the Rosy

Ring Around the Rosy

I love this picture.

I created it for my stepchildren to acknowledge the sense of spinning loyalties and movements that children of divorce may experience.

The story for so many kids in this situation is the sense of constant movement.

Always packing, unpacking, repacking.

“The two for one special.”

Two homes, two beds, two kitchens, two living rooms, two sets of rules, two sets of expectations for one child/ren.

Spinning, spinning, spinning.

Always remembering, reminding, checking it once, checking it twice – as information must make it not to one, but two, households.

Coordinate, coordinate, coordinate.

The “one for all” dynamic.

Child/ren as the “one” meeting the needs of the “all”, no matter how diverse, incongruent, and divisive the “all” may be.

The endless motivating, anticipating, hedging- as difficult discussions or situations arise and must be headed off at the pass.

Modulate. Modulate. Modulate.

Bring to balance what has fallen into ashes.

p.s I not only liked this picture for my stepkids, I liked it for me, or for anyone in a confusing situation. The image in the center is a figure bent over. Have you ever felt this way- head leaning over with fatigue and spinning and spinning around until you are completely dizzy? That is how life can be sometimes, and to me, this image speaks to that.


5 thoughts on “Ring Around the Rosy – Children of Divorce

  1. This conveys so beautifully what it is like to share the responsibility of raising child/ren in 2 houses. I am so glad I am past that stage in my life because my 2 oldest daughters are grown. I wish I could have seen it more clearly 10 years ago!

  2. I think the prevalence of divorce creates a kind of acceptance that this kind of life is ‘normal’ because so many others are living it. But from a kid’s point of view, it can be hellacious, overwhelming and scarring. Your awareness and caring is making your step-kids journey so much better, even more so because there seems to be little of it coming from the other faction.

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