Narcissists Defined

Narcissists defined in 3 words:

Perpetually contextually-challenged

Ever wonder why you can not discuss anything with a narcissist?
Do you leave any and all attempted conversations with these types confused, perplexed, questioning and a bit uncertain?
Do your best efforts at connection and resolution with this type leave you feeling symbolically impotent- with no hopes of ever getting it up again?

Never fear. The problem is not you.

Narcissists are forever, perpetually and contextually, challenged.
They can’t help it.

Narcissists have no awareness of context because the understanding of context requires an ability to move between self and other points.

Narcissists start at self, and well, stay at self.

Details, connections, interactions and engagements that create a web of context for most of us are lost on the narcissist.

This is why you can never believe what the narcissist says. Nor can you always anticipate the narcissist’s next move. You will link events in your mind leading to potential outcomes. The narcissist will ask “What events?”

There is simply no connection between “Me” and “The Rest of the World” for a narcissist.
There is “Me” and more “Me”.
And that’s all the context the narcissist seems to need.

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7 thoughts on “Narcissists Defined

  1. This brushes against the surface of the Post-Modern condition, where the denial of objectivity leads to a dangerous subjectivity, irrationality and incoherence. When the lens of naive optimism are placed aside it is clear that most people genuinely function this way -some to a much greater degree than others, of course, but with the great bulk of people behaving as such.

    Narcissists will tell you not only that they are right but, if they’re not, the best thing to do is ignore them and do what YOU want to do. And right next to them, emboldening their dangerous behaviour, is every commercial advertisement telling them that they are special in some way or other, that they are a real individual. Tying this unholy trinity together are the naive, the passive and the optimistic, who will tell you to simply ignore those people and, of all things, that most people actually aren’t like that at all.

    Most of the people in this world are narcissists of some bend or complicit in their behaviour. The rest of us are simply in pain because of it.

  2. Wonderfully put. In my relationship with my narcissist ex, I was so often stunned and confused by the fact that he could never, ever related to all the “context”, and all the history between us. It was like he was living on a cloud of his own, and in his mind, nothing he did should ever affect anyone else, cause it was just what “he did”, what “he needed” etc. A beautiful post about a tragic subject.

    • I am so glad you responded to my posting, yet, I am very sorry you had to experience a narcissist in your life. They truly do live on a cloud of their own with no connection with anything…including themselves.

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