Children of narcissists are incredibly resilient.
Their lives are lived in the foggy environment of narcissistic projections.
They reach out again and again to connect and there is nothing there authentically present from the parental perspective.
The hands of the children continually grasp and come up with air.
But this is too much to bear, so they keep trying and then trying some more.
Some way, some how, they magically tell themselves, the hand they grasp for will be there.
And it never is.
So they grasp some more. Distorted stories emerge. Parental fantasies abound. And the children continue to perform upon the stage of the parent’s delusions.
It’s all they have- for to walk off that stage of narcissistic projections- would be for the child to exist no more.
This is the pain of children of narcissists. Their entire lives are spent in a production performance lived upon the parent’s distorted stage. At times, the children know this, but they can’t stop the compulsion to perform, for they know, having lived it their entire lives, that to stop performing, would mean they no longer exist, child or not, in the narcissist’s eyes, parent or not.
So they perform. Wildly, crazily, a swirling dervish they become, all in attempt to “earn” some love.
This is the life of a child of a narcissist.