Children and Disappointment

meditativeecstasy
For those of you who celebrate the Easter holiday- Happy Easter! Short, little blog today about something that happened yesterday. My husband, stepkids and I went shopping. It’s a big deal for us, as we live out in the middle of nowhere. We went in order to purchase my stepdaughter some new jeans. She is at the age where on-line shopping simply is not going to cut it given how much her body is changing.

During the day, my stepson began to look more and more dejected. He managed to mope and drag his feet, slowly walking 15 yards behind us, through an entire wing of the mall. Although he had been allowed to purchase one small treat, he wanted more. His moping and feet dragging were designed to clearly convey how we had failed him, in case the tears and pleading had been lost on us.

My husband was very concerned stating that “Henry” (not his real name 🙂 ) seemed so disappointed.

Yes, “Henry” was disappointed. But, I pointed something out to my husband. Our job as parent and stepparent was not to raise two children who never experience disappointment. Our job as parent and stepparent was to raise children to grow up understanding how to handle disappointment.

A wonderful gift we can give our children is to help them understand they are not the center of the world. Life provides and life disappointments. A person of awareness and grace (a hope I my stepkidds will be) is able to handle both with a sense of compassion and understanding.

10 thoughts on “Children and Disappointment

  1. Yup..its so true..Kids need 2 larn how 2 face disappointments, how 2 struggle…they need 2 know they cannot always gt what they want… because if they don’t learn to accept these small things as kids..it will be real difficult for them to face the hard truths of life when they grow up.

    • It’s very rare for me to comment on the comments of others, very rare, and this is one of those rare comments.

      I have no idea why you felt the need to use chat speak for the word ‘to,’ the several ellipses and removed the letter ‘e’ from the words ‘learn’ and ‘get.’ These things make appreciating and taking seriously what you are saying very difficult, since, irrespective of whether or not you mean it to come across, the way you are expressing yourself demonstrates a lack of due care and attention. Sure, the omission of the letter ‘e’ in those two words can be a legitimate typo and we can’t catch everything, but in a response with chat speak and an improper use of ellipses I, at least, can’t appreciate what you are saying here.

      In the future, please look over your comments before posting them and be mindful of how you say what you choose to say.

      • Hello, I totally agree with all you said. These days we usually use the so-called “SMS/Chat” language everywhere & I apologize for the mistake. But, honestly speaking the “e” in learn was a typo, I noticed it just when I clicked on “Post comment” but I didn’t got a second chance as comments was published & there was no edit option.
        But, yes your message has reminded me something very useful, something that I need to avoid & be careful about beacuse I normally use this chat language.
        Nice to get your feedback 🙂

      • I am glad that my feedback was helpful and appreciated. Far, far too often people perceive corrective feedback as the worst sort of personal attack.

        With that said, I am constantly frustrated by the simple functions that WordPress does not provide and the way it mangles the functions it already has ‘working.’ For whatever reason, editing and preview functions don’t exist in the land of WordPress. Neither does the phrase ‘…dafuq!?!??!?!’

      • I believe there is always “Scope for Improvement” in all of us..& we all are continuous learners. And whenever someone gives a feedback, on which I have to work out & improve , I feel glad to add something for my development & growth. I know , I am not perfect but such feedback helps me to move one step closer to perfection.
        I am blessed to meet you all here 🙂

  2. I bow to your care for the souls connected to you in this role. Such a challenging dynamic even with the biological connection, so I truly admire how you relate what you bring of yourself to this part of your path and these relationships. Small steps on a long journey 🙂

    • Thank you so much for mentioning the “biological connection”. So many don’t appreciate that parenting is difficult enough, add in the lack of bio connection, and the difficulty increases. You are right- small steps- and I have seen my stepkids take some beautiful steps on their journeys!

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